Recently, our good friend master bandleader Richard “Swingin’ Dick” Long was married in a wonderful, blessed, and happy ceremony. He and his new bride were (and are) ecstatic and on cloud 9 ! Truly a joyous event and they have their newfound wedding license and certificate. Not only was it a wonderful emotional event, but also a fully legal ceremony between two American citizens; both of whom have contributed greatly to the defense of our nation and served her well.
The happy bride then switched her name from her maiden name to his; just as it should be and an affirmation of their union as one. Pretty easy, right ?
Nope.
As far as actually changing names that part was easy. But for everything else it’s extremely cumbersome in a man-made empire of useless junk. No doubt inspired by the equally useless TSA/DHS and the so-called ‘real ID’ mandates. Which let illegals storm our borders, protects Hamas and would be Islamic terrorists, but hassles only those who not only have the right to be here but also have greatly contributed to American society.
First came the Drivers’ license (headed up by the Texas DPS). A simple name change, right ? Log into the DPS website, upload the certified true copy of the marriage certificate and switch last names.
Nope. Gotta go to the DMV. But that’s not that painful, right ? Just a little bit of a wait for a simple clerical change ? Wrong again.
Our happy couple found out that the next available ‘appointment’ even for the simplest of tasks is between 2 and 5 months off–and on specific dates and times. Like a court date. And that the DPS run led DMV ONLY accepted appointments at the office designated near their house. Now the not-so-friendly-I-can’t-do-anything-to-help-you-girl at the front DID mention that they could log into the website and attempt (after entering a plethora of information over and over) for a ‘same day’ appointment. So Dick gave that a shot.
At 9 AM there were none. He was informed that those same-day appointments open up at 7:40 AM and it would be necessary not only to stand guard over the computer in an attempt to beat out the plethora of OTHER people applying there by rapidly logging in at that precise time, but also that the appointment would only be valid for THAT DAY. And would be at whatever time the DPS could accommodate them. Never mind his work schedule.
Now, both Dick and his bride are active contributors to our nation; Dick not only is a renown bandleader but also currently instructs flying (and retired after 20 years of military service). And his bride diligently works at a defense plant crafting America’s front line fighter aircraft. So they both have jobs and commitments (and not to mention pay taxes that are apparently being used against them to thwart the simplest of tasks). And as such (like most working productive Americans) don’t have weeks available to chase down a simple thing like a wife changing her name on her license.
But it gets better. If his beautiful bride wishes to do a name change on the passport, it needs to have this bottleneck issue of a driver license solved. As does opening up a joint bank account (never mind the fact that this can be done with the previous name quite easily OR by using a maiden name for a plethora of credit and accounts).
There is no common sense here or issue of public safety. Illegals and miscreants simply go without. And understandably so; just so happens that Dick met another gentleman at the DPS DMV who was trying to fix an issue with his license–making a good faith attempt at doing the right thing. No can do. Appointment (6 months later) is the only option. So his solution was “I guess I’ll just have to drive dirty for awhile.” To which Dick responded “Ya know, I served 20 years in the military and have abided by rules and regulations most of my life. That’s the best common sense solution to this bureaucratic idiocy that I’ve heard. Probably time for the rest of us to join ya.”
Good citizens make good faith attempts to do the right thing. And are thwarted by customer disservice and crazy bureaucratic rules which are impossible for any reasonable man to follow. Our rules let the guilty go and simply punish the innocent. Time to go without.
Then Dick got to thinking; if he DOES change one name on a license, the changing from maiden to married last names on the license might have OTHER unintended consequences. Namely that for a booked vacation, the name change on the license would not match the one on the ticket. Now any reasonable person would realize that a woman had gotten married and changed from her maiden name and now has a new last name.
But it’s not like any of the “Real ID” mafia is reasonable. Dick’s pretty certain that the new married name not agreeing with the ticket would trigger the blue shirt brownshirts and cause havoc trying to board an airplane.
“We decided to kinda leave things as they are until we get 6-months of lead time to make the changes. We’ll change the names everywhere it’s just the ‘official’ ID’s like licenses and passports or names on bank accounts that can wait. All the debit cards/credit cards/bank accounts work just fine with the right codes and don’t really care who we are where the rubber meets the road. These bureaucratic idiots are easy to work around because they assume you’re following THEIR rules. So we’ll just ‘drive dirty’ until the state can make some time for US.”
As usual, we think Dick’s spot on and advise our clients to behave accordingly. These rulemaking people are the same ones putting flow restrictors in YOUR shower while watering THEIR lawn unencumbered (using over a years worth of showers in one lawn watering event). Or jetting off to some climate conference with their SUV entourage using more energy in one trip than an average working family uses in years. Freighters crash into bridges and diesel trucks simply stop working because a trivial EPA mandated emission box throws a fault code and demands the engine be shut down rather than allow it to operate on partial power at higher emissions.
The entire event has given Dick a bit more humility though. “I used to worry about voter fraud and was convinced that EVERY voter NEEDED an ID. Now I’ve seen how difficult it can be. For renewing a license, or an address change, it’s pretty easy because it’s online. But until you become a member of the “Real ID” club–which demands some pretty painful and non-customer oriented things–it’s REALLY hard. I’m certain that this disenfranchises many voters in that not many ‘normal’ people have the opportunity to take time off work or book appointments 4 months in advance (or sit there every morning at 740 pecking away at a computer HOPING for a slot that day) to do something simple like get or make name changes on a license. It’s certainly possible that many people who are entitled to vote are disenfranchised by the huge state run megabureaucratical burden and can’t get one a reasonable time before an election. So the ‘no ID’ voter advocates definitely have a legitimate point.”
Diatomaceous-Johnson 